The sunset on my last day in Panama was magnificent. The slower pace and nurturing presence of the ocean helped me to breathe again, more deeply than I had done in the past year and a half. I made the choice to take this trip as my pandemic advisor job will soon end. All necessary precautions were taken for the trip and cases in both my town and in Panama were very low. Panama even had quick testing centers in the airport with very little lines. This trip helped me to see what responsible travel looks like for the remainder of the pandemic. I returned healthier than when I first landed.
I sat on an obscene mound of pillows on my hotel bed, looking as if the storybook character from the “Princess and the Pea” was trying to achieve enlightenment. In mediation, memories of my trip flashed across the screen inside my mind. A memory flashed of me surfing on warm water waves that were a few feet taller than my 6’1” frame. I remembered various plates of new cuisine, most of which was wrapped inside of carbs and then either baked or fried. When I drank Panamanian coffee, the heavens parted the clouds and beamed a ray of sunlight on my terrace. The faces of new friends danced across the screen. Finally, I remembered the images of sunsets splashing the rich colors of tropical fruit throughout the sky.
Panama gave me time to reflect upon the next phase of my life. So many of my lifelong goals have already been met. I’m currently putting the final touches on my documentary “Sakura & Pearls: Healing from World War II” which will appear on a major American TV network later this year (details to come). I published my guidebook “Healing Our Bloodlines: The 8 Realizations of Generational Liberation” which was the culmination of 15 years of workshops and client sessions. The book took me 12 years to write, starting from my earliest notes and later progressing to a blistering number of drafts that left calluses on my fingertips. I surfed 40 surf breaks on Oahu and only have 1 spot left on my list to surf. After achieving all of these goals, my life has slowed down, as if my momentum was spent. In this slowness was a new stillness.
Shuffling my rump on the pile of 6 makeshift meditation pillows, I embraced this foreign stillness. It made me uncomfortable, because I didn’t recognize it. My new inertia was absent of a clear direction. “What do I do next?” I thought. At first, I mistook the inertia for being a trap, some kind of lazy trance that would ensnare me into a Ben & Jerry’s binge-watching marathon. The inner pressure to figure out what to do next was building. Thoughts raced through my overworked brain, trying to manufacture a plan for my next steps without having clarity about what I want out of my life. These were the aftereffects of leading pandemic response teams while having a full private practice and also editing my first feature length documentary for American TV. On so many occasions, I’ve reminded my clients to take care of themselves. But selfcare has been a struggle for all of us this past year, myself included. The collision of the most virulent pandemic of the century with a limited time opportunity to broadcast my documentary has challenged all of my self care habits. It has been overwhelming. My break in Panama was the first time that I could recover my energy without an urgent interruption wrestling away my attention.
As I meditated on my pillow throne, on my last night in Panama, a vision of the future came to me. The discomfort around the inertia dissolved and an inner sense of calm expanded from my torso. The calmness enveloped my entire body. I felt an invisible barrier pushing outwards through my skin, creating a peaceful globe all around me. The outside world felt far away as I focused on the movement of my inner world. The emptiness inside of me changed from a desert-like dearth into an inviting space for something new to enter.
Then the vision entered my mind. I saw myself leaving America.
The vision showed me 4 new nations where I will be sharing my teachings, The 8 Realizations of Generational Healing. These countries were Mexico, Costa Rica, Panama, and Peru. These will be the places where I will find many people who are currently awakening to the power of generational healing work. They need the tools that I helped to develop over the past 2 decades in order to take their next steps. Each nation will have it’s own Catalyst Community where people who are breaking free from the generational burdens can gather together for support and validation. To teach in these Spanish speaking nations, I will need to advance my Spanish language skills from high-intermediate to complete fluency. I anticipate that this process will require about a year to complete while living in a Spanish speaking country.
Although I am exploring a new place to live outside of the US, I do see myself offering an annual tour that goes through America with stops in Los Angeles and Hawaii. The annual tour will feature book talks for Healing Our Bloodlines as well as for new books that I plan to publish in the near future. It will also feature live, in-person premieres of my documentary, Sakura & Pearls: Healing from World War II, followed by Q&A sessions. The tour will include radio and television appearances to share about the work to larger audiences. The tour will start with annual showings of my documentary in Japan (in Hiroshima, Nagasaki, and Osaka) during the Atomic Bomb commemorations of Aug 6th and Aug 9th. My next tour is currently scheduled for August-September of 2022, starting in Japan, then Hawaii, and ending in Los Angeles.
The city of Los Angeles is scheduled to fully reopen on June 15th and I will be coming to LA to shoot my next documentary. I anticipate being there for at least 6 weeks starting at the end of June. After this stop in LA, I will take a few weeks off to experience the road trip of a lifetime. Starting in California, I’ll drive through all of Central America to Panama. Along the way, I’ll be exploring places for future events. A few places on my radar include Puerto Vallarta, Cancun, and the ancient ruins of Tulum. Then I’ll go diving at the Belize Barrier Reef, one of the natural wonders of the world. I’ll make my way down to Costa Rica to surf at a few new beaches. Finally, I will arrive in Panama to explore this lush country for a new home.
Distance sessions via video chat will still be available even while I’m living abroad. In the event that my practice is full, I can provide you with a trusted referral to high quality practitioners who have availability.
I want to assure my clients and readers that I will be providing more updates about this turning point in my life. These plans will expand my offerings in new ways throughout the Americas. As we move closer to a New Normal in our daily lives, I will be planting the seeds to expand my message about the importance of Generational Liberation.