We all have secrets. It’s an important part of the human experience. Secrets are valuable because they’re connected to the parts of ourselves that we haven’t fully embraced yet. Do you sing the in shower and dream of being on stage, but never sing when other people are around? Do you have a secret crush on someone you know? Did you endure something in the past that very few people know about? Even though secrets connect us to the parts of ourselves that are still emerging, they are often seen as a negative thing to have, which discourages us from seeking a trusted supporter to talk about it. If we share the secret with the wrong person, we can be judged or betrayed if the private information is shared with other people before we are ready.
Wrapped around those hidden memories are the unexpressed emotions that are waiting to be discovered. Another reason that we hesitate to explore our secrets is that they often come with strong emotions that can feel overwhelming. But feeling those emotions are worth it, because secrets carry lessons that are waiting to teach us. When pay attention to our secrets, we bring the light of our awareness to them, which helps us dissolve any uncomfortable emotions associated with the memories. Once the emotions wash away, we can see that part of ourselves that we don’t show to the outside world. Healing starts with sharing what happened to us with a trusted friend, counselor, or confidential workshop, much like the client stories that I feature in my new book Healing Our Bloodlines. One we speak about what happened in the past, we bring light into the dark caverns of our subconscious minds and shed the emotional heaviness. That catharsis brings us relief.
Rather than seeing secrets as being negative, see them as fertile ground for building intimacy. When we share a secret with a trusted confidant, we allow our emotions to flow and our hearts to open. We become more aware of other parts of ourselves that are still evolving. The relief that comes with that release creates new space to give and receive support with our supporters. When both people share their secrets with each other, both people are vulnerable and that trust builds. The bond of that relationship grows stronger.
When was the last time you shared a secret with a trusted friend?
My Challenge Exercise for you this week is to write in a confidential diary about one of your secrets. Read it to yourself when you are done writing, then go take a walk in the fresh air. How do you feel afterwards?
September 3rd, 2019 at 6pm PT/9pm ET, I’ll be doing my online Book Launch for Healing Our Bloodlines: The 8 Realizations of Generational Liberation on IG Live and FB Live